Jato, sorry to hear man, I know it sucks. In fact it sucking is the only guarantee I can give you for losing someone close. Over time it sucks less, but prior to the sucking less trend, it tends toward sucking more for a while, it will bounce around some days and suck less, but then it goes back up again. As for timelines and when grieving is over, it all depends, too many factors and there are no hard an fast rules. Some days you will feel strong, some days weak. It seems like in general the first year or so floats around in the surreal, I think the hardest part is when it finally becomes real, like really real. To me this is the worst part, but it is when healing starts as well, and we all know that the worst pain can come when the wounds are healing. I know this isn't your belief, but you have my prayers regardless! It's a tough ride, but hang on, you'll grow and heal. She'll always be a part of you!
Thank you! It does suck. It will always suck. I have a new life. As my grief counselor so intelligently put it, I now have this new passenger to carry through life. I'm just learning to deal with it.
Ride and ride some more is what I have been doing. It's been better therapy than the one on one counseling, partial hospitalization therapy and the psycho meds they originally put me on. Motorcycles have kept me going.
Last weekend I finally got my Buell back. I don't remember if I mentioned that my uncle wrecked it when he was helping us move and riding it from the old house to the new house in January. I guess cold tires and not being used to the power (he rides an early 2000's Street Glide) got the best of him. So I finally got up the ambition to do most of the repair work and my brother in law, who is a certified Harley tech and bike builder, finished it.
Riding the Grom so much I didn't think I missed the power and the thrill of the Buell. Boy was I wrong. Every time since the first test ride after the repairs I've been riding stupidly because I have zero F's to give at this point. Adrenaline is very addicting! But I realized I don't want to unnecessarily put my family through more grief if I were to end up making a mistake and splattering myself on the road. So the beautiful Buell will get sold and I will miss it dearly. I bought it brand new in 2007 right out of college and it was my first real motorcycle. I learned to ride on it. Looking back, I have no idea how I was able to learn on this bike. It has more power than I should have had back then.
So my responsible irresponsible decision was to force myself to slowdown by buying this 2020 Harley Davidson Fat Bob 114 yesterday. This photo was taken about halfway through the return trip to home in PA. You can see my pops and his truck in the background. He bought this truck from his step son and it is a little power monster with a cam and great exhaust. It sounds like a well tuned race car. I just can't get over how much I love the sound of that truck! It makes me giddy!
I started looking at the Honda Rebel 1100, but I simply can't find one of those anywhere as it's a brand new model. So then I started looking at Harleys since they are good looking bikes. I fell in love with the Fat Bob when I saw it and sat on it. A test ride solidified that. And when I saw online that it was offered in Performance Orange, but only in 2020, I knew I had to have one. I'm not a black motorcycle kind of guy. So I found this Fat Bob in Maryland, thanks to my brother in law telling me to check the Chesapeake Harley Davidson dealer. It only had 1,167 miles on it. My dad and I drove down to Maryland with his truck. I intended to put it in the bed of his truck for the ride home because I'm not typically a long distance rider, especially on highways, and because the weather was so uncertain with Hurricane Ida Ho.
Well the weather was acceptable and I was so excited to get on the bike that I rode the 2 hour return trip from Maryland and it was a ton of fun. I didn't get wet until we got into PA. It definitely didn't feel like 2 hours because it's still such a new to me bike and because the bike is so comfortable compared to my Buell and Grom. We took a much more scenic route on the way home to avoid traffic on 476 and 95. Bob, as I call him, still has some power to entertain me and it handles much better than such a heavy bike has any right to so I should be content for a good while. And most of the riding I do these days is either solo or with cruisers so I have no need for the Buell. It's no fun to ride on back roads in 1st or 2nd gear with that bike. It just wants to go faster than cruiser speeds. And the Grom hits the rev limiter in 4th (top gear) at 70 MPH so that's no good for longer rides or highway rides. It's too much of a strain on the engine to drone along at 9,000 RPMs for more than a few minutes at a time. The Grom and Fat Bob are both staying so I have some variety.
Meet Bob - Fat Bob!
